Memories of Freshman Year

The nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, can't-sleep-naturally-because-of-stress medicine.
Originally uploaded by swarthbore.

I was reminded recently of a particularly funny episode from my first and, I hardly need add, most disasterous finals period here at Swat.

On second thought, "disasterous" is being kind - the entire thing ended with me downing a bottle of No-Doz, eventually realizing that I would NEVER understand quantum mechanics, calling my parents at 4 in the morning strung out out of my mind ("Mom, Dad, will you still love me if I fail out of college!?") and then talking my way into a passing grade my exploiting my Physics' professors' love of Magritte. And they say art history isn't useful...

Luckily, my friend Jackie held on to one of the more choice relics from this period of my life: my e-mail correspondance with Vicks. I tried to clean up the formatting a bit, but don't let that fool you. This shit is real. However, I would like to emphasize that it's a joke - I think that most of you who read this probably already know me and, consequently, know that I'm not a NyQuil addict or anything - the rest of you will probably have to take my word for it.

Gentlemen...BEHOLD:

From: vicks.im@pg.com
Date: Mon, 17 Dec 2001 10:03:45 -0500
To: aronan1@swarthmore.edu
Subject: Re: Message from Vicks Website

Hi Anne.

Thanks for contacting us. We appreciate your comments about Vicks NyQuil but it should not be used as a sleep aid nor should it be used after your cold symptoms are gone. All of our Vicks products are safe when used as directed but this means package instructions need to be followed.

Gary
USA Vicks Team

Internet Mail Message
Received from host: [206.128.187.190]
[206.128.187.190]

From: aronan1@swarthmore.edu on 12/17/2001 08:26 AM GMT

aronan1@swarthmore.edu To: Ion Vicks-IM/PGI
Cc:
Subject: Message from Vicks Website
12/17/2001 03:26 AM


Country = UNITED STATES
EMail = aronan1@swarthmore.edu
Content = "Dearest Vicks,
I would just like to thank you for making such fine NyQuil related products. Without NyQuil, and the way that it makes me fall asleep while fully clothed in public areas I don't know how I would have survived this final exam period.

My personal favorite is Red, but why no other flavors? I, for one, would like to mix and match, perhaps mix a cocktail of apple and cranberry NyQuil, or a lovely citrus blend.

Even after my cold went away two months ago, I still find that NyQuil is a refreshing alternative to natural sleep patterns. By becoming completely nocturnal I am able to be free of distraction and do much more work than the average college student. Without NyQuil this would not be possible.

Thank you and God bless.
Sincerely,
Anne Ronan"

Can I also just add quickly that Jackie is amazing?