But...But...I don't WANNA be a yuppie!

But, mom, I don't WANT to be a yuppie!
Originally uploaded by swarthbore.

Alright, so maybe Boston actually is kinda lame.

I'm going back to Boston, in fact, for spring break, and what says "SPRING BREAK!" better than "26 degrees, Mostly Cloudy!?"

I have to admit that this hurts extra bad since all my swat friends are heading down to sunny Florida next week. I'm coping with this in a number of ways:

a) Reminding myself that I hate both the heat and being outdoors.

b) Remembering the fact that I still haven't gotten on the ball with job applications. Visualizing myself unemployed this time next year, chain smoking in the basement and watching an "I'm ambivalent about the '60s" marathon on VH1...it helps keep my level of motivation up. I also wish I could show you guys a picture of my Dad's "disappointed" face - that shit cuts deep, man.

c) Anticipating how much free stuff I'm going to get at home. Hooray! At home everything is free: laundry, school supplies, replacement cell phone adapters...

d) Appreciating the fact that I'm saving a buttload of cash.

e) Accepting bets for who is going to "go wild" first.

I've also been looking on the internet to see what Boston has to offer these days.

First of all, Boston.com has this strange "nightlife" slide show where they show you unflattering photos of everyday yuppies getting shitfaced. (I included two photos from said slideshow on today's blog entry - did you notice?). As if I needed another goddamned reason to never want to grow up.



Secondly, "The TD BankNorth Garden?!?" Is that for real? Hardly rolls off the tongue. Not sure, but I may actually prefer the "Derek Jeter Center" over that shit...okay I only kind of mean that. What about calling it the "Big Ole Whore Garden" - at least that sounds like someplace people would like to visit.

Also, thankyou Boston.com for the headline: "Police say men butchered goat for crack."

And finally, what would you guess is the big new show at Boston Museum of Fine Arts? "Speed, Style & Beauty: Cars from the Ralph Lauren Collection."

What.

The.

Hell.

Call me an elitist, call me ignorant, but fucking cars?!...no, no, fucking RALPH LAUREN'S cars?! I mean, god forbid they were some NOBODY'S cars.



I just don't know how I feel about this. I mean, I suppose it's justified, and I guess exhibiting one type of commodity that only rich people can afford is no different than exhibiting another (paintings, for instance), but...but...CARS?!

Then again, the discussion in my last art history class was on how museums and exhibition practice in general is an act of colonialization and blah blah blah, so I don't know shit anymore. I don't know anything about anything.

Wait. I do know that this thing is funny.